My beautiful creature,
Today is weird. It's one of those days when there's nothing wrong in particular - you do all the things you needed, wanted to do, and yet it feels like something is off. Like somehow the day lacks it's day-ness. Or maybe it's just you, lacking your you-ness.
I listened to your list of songs while walking in the marshes. I said that I knew some of them. I lied. Turns out I knew all.
In between robins, cows and muntjacs peaking their heads out on my path I thought that that list is... Very much you. How could it not be. Very much 80s. And very hopeful.
I think that's what surprised me the most. Hope.
I know I know you. But it got me wondering... How much of you I still can't see. Or haven't seen. How much is still there - on that bright side of the moon, the one that comes out to play when noone watches, and yet can see glimpses of you being more. Way mucher than you normally allow yourself to be.
I'm inventing words today, so forgive me for not being as clear.
You said that I'm the ocean.
If that is true, then you're an iceberg. There's always one side I can't see. Even when you decide to flip over - supposedly a rare occurance in nature - the side that I've already seen has changed.
But it's ok. You have no idea how happy it makes me to see hope in you. To see joy.
And maybe one day I'll see you wiggling your butt to Prince. Because you just have to.
This is a short one. A lazy one. My head keeps jumping around and I can't keep attention too long in one place.
Usually it settles on you. Just standing there. Or in the bend of my neck, and me just holding you.
I won't tell you that it turns dark relatively quickly after that. Where your head, my hands travel to.
I won't tell you that ever since I saw Dusk till Dawn I wanted to recreate one particular scene. At first I made some amends to it, but knowing what I know now - knowing things for sure - I think original would do, too.
I won't tell you any of that, and wish you a good, calm night.
Take care of yourself. Be nice.
And I'll do the same.
Pinky promise.
Remember?